Also, peoples' comments I felt like including are listed in italics with the person's name in parenthesis
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May 11, 2006
So as most of you know my dh is deployed to Iraq right now. He's scheduled to come home in Oct for 2 weeks of R&R and then for good April of 2007.
My ds1 will be 4 on Saturday. Today he looked at me with sad little almost 4-year-old eyes and said that he needed his daddy. I told him that daddy is working at Army man camp right now. He said that he wanted daddy to be done at Army man camp and come home now (with his hummer). I told him that daddy is working really hard and won't be able to be done for a long time and that his hummer isn't really his, it's the army's but maybe when daddy comes home to visit in October we could go somewhere and see a different hummer. I offered to go write an email to daddy and he said he didn't want to right now. Maybe later. He just looked so sad.
I don't know what else to tell him. We're having a party with my parents and siblings and I invited my FIL and one of my BILs and his wife, but I can tell that given ds1's personality it won't be the same without his daddy there. Ds2 probably won't even know the difference when his birthday rolls around in August, but my ds1 is so detail oriented that I know it's just not right for his daddy to be working at Army man camp on his birthday.
I'm having a really hard time trying to stay positive for my kids right now. I know this is just the beginning. I don't know how I'll make it through dd's first birthday in June. I can't believe my dh is going to miss our dd's first birthday.
October just seems so far away right now and then it's not the end. He'll still have 6 months to go after that.
Okay, enough for now. DD is sleeping, ds1 is with my parents and ds2 is spending the day in his room (that's another story I don't have time to get into right now). I have to go take advantage of the "no kids" time and clean my rotten house to get ready for this party that I don't even feel up to having right now. TTFN
Kate
My ds1 will be 4 on Saturday. Today he looked at me with sad little almost 4-year-old eyes and said that he needed his daddy. I told him that daddy is working at Army man camp right now. He said that he wanted daddy to be done at Army man camp and come home now (with his hummer). I told him that daddy is working really hard and won't be able to be done for a long time and that his hummer isn't really his, it's the army's but maybe when daddy comes home to visit in October we could go somewhere and see a different hummer. I offered to go write an email to daddy and he said he didn't want to right now. Maybe later. He just looked so sad.
I don't know what else to tell him. We're having a party with my parents and siblings and I invited my FIL and one of my BILs and his wife, but I can tell that given ds1's personality it won't be the same without his daddy there. Ds2 probably won't even know the difference when his birthday rolls around in August, but my ds1 is so detail oriented that I know it's just not right for his daddy to be working at Army man camp on his birthday.
I'm having a really hard time trying to stay positive for my kids right now. I know this is just the beginning. I don't know how I'll make it through dd's first birthday in June. I can't believe my dh is going to miss our dd's first birthday.
October just seems so far away right now and then it's not the end. He'll still have 6 months to go after that.
Okay, enough for now. DD is sleeping, ds1 is with my parents and ds2 is spending the day in his room (that's another story I don't have time to get into right now). I have to go take advantage of the "no kids" time and clean my rotten house to get ready for this party that I don't even feel up to having right now. TTFN
Kate
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May 27, 2006
May 27, 2006
My dh just told me that he's heard from a couple of different people that they could be coming home as early as January! I know it's just a rumor and I still tell people it will be April, but I am praying like crazy that rumor is true! I just figured if anyone around here has a few extra prayers to spare could you send a couple up for me? I have been praying he'll be home for my birthday in March, but this would be even better! Yes, I am prepared for it to not be true, and I'm not going to believe it until it actually happens even if he says it's true (since the military can easily change their mind whenever they want to). It's just exciting to me that there is even the slightest possibility that he'll be home early.
Kate
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Kate
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June 3, 2006
So my dh has been calling me daily since May 11 which has totally spoiled me and gotten me out of the habit of dealing with a day without a phone call. Now today he didn't call which if fine because I can deal with a day without a phone call. I have before. I figured I'd at least have an email since he has access to a computer in the arms room where he works and friends of ours had a baby yesterday and I emailed him about it last night, but I don't have an email from him either.
so now the paranoia it setting in. My parents (who live next door) took my ds1 to visit my brother so they're not around and I can't get a hold of any of my friends to talk some sense into me so I figured I'd post here and see if any of you can help with that. I have been telling myself that he's probably just busy or something, but then the little voice in my head argues with me that he should never be too busy to send me a quick email! besides being concerned about my dh should I be concerned that I am hearing voices?
thanks for listening!
Kate
so now the paranoia it setting in. My parents (who live next door) took my ds1 to visit my brother so they're not around and I can't get a hold of any of my friends to talk some sense into me so I figured I'd post here and see if any of you can help with that. I have been telling myself that he's probably just busy or something, but then the little voice in my head argues with me that he should never be too busy to send me a quick email! besides being concerned about my dh should I be concerned that I am hearing voices?
thanks for listening!
Kate
so I just got an email from dh and he's fine and has been really busy all day and when he went to call me the lines were really long so he's going to try again in a few minutes.
I knew I didn't need to worry, but sometimes I just can't help it. Thanks to anyone who actually read this.
Kate
I knew I didn't need to worry, but sometimes I just can't help it. Thanks to anyone who actually read this.
Kate
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June 22, 2006
June 22, 2006
So when my dh called this morning about halfway through the conversation he got really quiet and then asked me if dd even knew who he was. I had to be honest and answer no, she's a baby and doesn't really know anybody. You can't expect her to. As much as we both know it's true I know it's hard for him and it just breaks my heart to have to tell him that.
Her first birthday is next week so I'm sure he's feeling down because of that. He's been gone since she was 4 months old. yes, I show her pictures and he talks to her on the phone, but honestly there is no way she knows the difference between him being her daddy or my brother (who we only see every few months) being her uncle.
This is just so hard to deal with. I know it helps him that the boys know who he is and remember things that he does with them like go to the park or look for frogs and they talk about that stuff with him.
It's just that time is something you can never get back and he's missed out on all her "firsts." With the boys being older he's really missed out on less with them. Yeah there's stuff, but when you think about it the first year of a child's life is full of new things where the following years have less of that.
This has been bugging me all day and I hope actually putting it into words will get it out of my head so I can stop feeling so down. Thanks for listening.
Kate
Her first birthday is next week so I'm sure he's feeling down because of that. He's been gone since she was 4 months old. yes, I show her pictures and he talks to her on the phone, but honestly there is no way she knows the difference between him being her daddy or my brother (who we only see every few months) being her uncle.
This is just so hard to deal with. I know it helps him that the boys know who he is and remember things that he does with them like go to the park or look for frogs and they talk about that stuff with him.
It's just that time is something you can never get back and he's missed out on all her "firsts." With the boys being older he's really missed out on less with them. Yeah there's stuff, but when you think about it the first year of a child's life is full of new things where the following years have less of that.
This has been bugging me all day and I hope actually putting it into words will get it out of my head so I can stop feeling so down. Thanks for listening.
Kate
Thanks everybody for your suggestions and your support. I'll have to send a few books and blank tapes with my next care package to dh. That's an idea I didn't think of. I do have a video of dh reading to the boys before he left, but ds2 was being a pill when we taped it so we don't watch it often since it's not really what we wanted it to be for the boys.
mom4three- I do have a video camera. We got one at christmas for that very reason. I have just found that it's really hard to take videos when it's just me. I am hoping that a friend will help me burn a few DVDs of our home movies to send to dh since he has a portable DVD player over there.
Cheryl- I totally understand wanting the kids to miss your dh more. Ds1 has his days once-in-a-while where he wants daddy to be "done with armyman camp" but ds2 is just business as usual. When I told dh that he was surprised since he thought ds2 would have a harder time with things, but it doesn't surprise me in the least since that fits their personalities so well. I guess I'm glad they're doing so well because that does make it easier for me, but at the same time it is so hard. You know? How much longer until your dh is home?
4arrows- dh gets to come home for 2 weeks in October and then has to go back for another 6 months so he won't be home for good until next April. he has heard rumors that it could be earlier, but we're not going to believe it until it actually happens.
Today has been a much better day. Dh did sound a little down when I spoke to him this morning, bu the said he was just tired and stressed with some of the stuff he's been doing the last couple of days. Thanks again everybody.
Kate Oh, Kate, I just saw this and now am about to cry with you.....
I have no real understanding of that, as my hubby is only gone for at most three weeks at a time. Your post gives me new appreciation, though, for what you ALL go through on our behalf, so thank you for reminding me. I will add this to my list of things to pray about for you guys...wish I could do more. {{{HUGS}}} (dawnie)
mom4three- I do have a video camera. We got one at christmas for that very reason. I have just found that it's really hard to take videos when it's just me. I am hoping that a friend will help me burn a few DVDs of our home movies to send to dh since he has a portable DVD player over there.
Cheryl- I totally understand wanting the kids to miss your dh more. Ds1 has his days once-in-a-while where he wants daddy to be "done with armyman camp" but ds2 is just business as usual. When I told dh that he was surprised since he thought ds2 would have a harder time with things, but it doesn't surprise me in the least since that fits their personalities so well. I guess I'm glad they're doing so well because that does make it easier for me, but at the same time it is so hard. You know? How much longer until your dh is home?
4arrows- dh gets to come home for 2 weeks in October and then has to go back for another 6 months so he won't be home for good until next April. he has heard rumors that it could be earlier, but we're not going to believe it until it actually happens.
Today has been a much better day. Dh did sound a little down when I spoke to him this morning, bu the said he was just tired and stressed with some of the stuff he's been doing the last couple of days. Thanks again everybody.
Kate Oh, Kate, I just saw this and now am about to cry with you.....
I have no real understanding of that, as my hubby is only gone for at most three weeks at a time. Your post gives me new appreciation, though, for what you ALL go through on our behalf, so thank you for reminding me. I will add this to my list of things to pray about for you guys...wish I could do more. {{{HUGS}}} (dawnie)
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June 25, 2006
So at church today I spoke with a friend of my mom's who was visiting. Her son-in-law is serving in Iraq with the same unit or whatever that my dh is with (just a different company or whatever). Anyway, she said that he had put in to come home for R&R in January and that he was just told that they aren't allowing any guys to take R&R in January now. His thought on that is that they will either be transitioning the new unit taking over for them when they leave or already on their way home. I don't want to get my hopes up, but if they're really not letting guys take R&R in January when that was originally one of the options I have to think it means something. Anyway, I just wanted to share what could potentially be really good news!
Kate
Kate
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June 27, 2006
June 27, 2006
hey guys. Could you please send up a few prayers for me today? It's already started out as a cry fest (I think having my period may be partially to blame). It's dd's first birthday and I have a ton to do before her party this evening (only grandparents, but I still need to have a clean house). I'm just not motivated and all I want to do is curl up in a chair with my baby girl and just cry. Gosh, I wish her daddy was here. Usually he helps with the kids so I can do the house stuff. Besides that I'm just so sad that he's not here for her birthday. I talked to him this morning and I couldn't help it, I started crying on the phone. so now he probably is thinking I'm a blubbering idiot or something. he told me to " hang in there" which I am getting so sick and tired of hearing I could just scream. I don't have a choice. I have to " hang in there" whether I want to or not. There isn't an alternative.
Sorry to vent like this I just don't know of anywhere else I can get "instant" support from so many people and I really feel like I need it today. Thanks. I'm so glad I found you guys. It really does help make things a little easier. Well, duty calls. I think I'm going to take the kids for pancakes to celebrate birthday breakfast. Then I can pick up a few things at the store and head home to finish all the fun. I did get the cake done yesterday so there's one less thing to worry about. (I just hope my boys leave it alone until the party!)
Thanks again for listening. It really does help.
Kate
Sorry to vent like this I just don't know of anywhere else I can get "instant" support from so many people and I really feel like I need it today. Thanks. I'm so glad I found you guys. It really does help make things a little easier. Well, duty calls. I think I'm going to take the kids for pancakes to celebrate birthday breakfast. Then I can pick up a few things at the store and head home to finish all the fun. I did get the cake done yesterday so there's one less thing to worry about. (I just hope my boys leave it alone until the party!)
Thanks again for listening. It really does help.
Kate
Sweet Kate, I am so sorry for you today! I can not begin to imagine the heartache you feel at not having your dh here for your dd's first birthday. You are NOT a blubbering idiot!! You are sad and lonely and your family is not together. Of course you're going to cry!
Dear Lord,
We lift our sister, Kate, up to you today. Thank you for her healthy daughter who has grown a whole year today! Thank you for sustaining their family thus far with the head of them being on the other side of the world. Be Kate's Heavenly Father today. Be the boys' Father, be a Father to the little girl. I pray that peace would surround and envelope them as they celebrate a special day. Hold Kate's husband in the palm of your hand as he works so hard so far away from his family. We pray that you would bring him home safely at the appointed time, if not earlier! We ask these things in your will, knowing you know what's best. We love you, Lord.
Amen (boo/Ann)
Dear Lord,
We lift our sister, Kate, up to you today. Thank you for her healthy daughter who has grown a whole year today! Thank you for sustaining their family thus far with the head of them being on the other side of the world. Be Kate's Heavenly Father today. Be the boys' Father, be a Father to the little girl. I pray that peace would surround and envelope them as they celebrate a special day. Hold Kate's husband in the palm of your hand as he works so hard so far away from his family. We pray that you would bring him home safely at the appointed time, if not earlier! We ask these things in your will, knowing you know what's best. We love you, Lord.
Amen (boo/Ann)
Thanks everybody. the house didn't get as fabulous as I would have liked, but I kind of lost my motivation when my FIL called to say he was just going to stop by to drop off the present and wouldn't be staying for supper after all (at first I was ticked about that, but I got over it). For some reason having my parents over doesn't give me the same motivation to clean as having dh's family or my siblings over. Maybe that's because they live next door...
Anyway, dd is getting her bottom molars and was miserable the whole time. I don't know if we even got a picture of her with her cake. My mom said we'll have to "redo" the party after she has her teeth so she can blow out her candle and bite her cake and all the fun first birthday stuff kids do when they feel better.
I was still sad throughout the day, but with her being so sad because of her teeth I got a lot of cuddle time in which is always nice. Unfortunately she's not a really big cuddler unless really tired or sick or in pain. I'm kind of sad about that, but that's just her personality and that's just the way it is so I have to deal with it. That just makes the snuggle time we do have all that much sweeter.
Anyway, thanks again for your thoughts and prayers. I really do appreciate having the support group I have found on here.
Kate
Anyway, dd is getting her bottom molars and was miserable the whole time. I don't know if we even got a picture of her with her cake. My mom said we'll have to "redo" the party after she has her teeth so she can blow out her candle and bite her cake and all the fun first birthday stuff kids do when they feel better.
I was still sad throughout the day, but with her being so sad because of her teeth I got a lot of cuddle time in which is always nice. Unfortunately she's not a really big cuddler unless really tired or sick or in pain. I'm kind of sad about that, but that's just her personality and that's just the way it is so I have to deal with it. That just makes the snuggle time we do have all that much sweeter.
Anyway, thanks again for your thoughts and prayers. I really do appreciate having the support group I have found on here.
Kate
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